The words: “College is the best time of your life. Love it while you can.” consume me. I am a fantasizer, a young woman who can’t help but visualize college as this magical place where I am supposed to find my best friends for life.
It felt as if there was a calculated path to follow and if you followed it you would be set up for success. For example: Step 1- join a sorority and meet your future bridesmaids. Step 2- join a club for your major so it’s not all social and is also academic to build your resume. Step 3- Join an intramural sport so you are getting some exercise and staying fit.
But, how could I have done all those steps correctly, yet still feel so out of place and lonely. Why do the thoughts of: Did I make the right decision of where to go to college?, or Dang my friends from high school look like they are having the time of their life, or How am I ever going to meet friends who are real and have my back? Why do these thoughts fill my head, pushing me further and further down into a hole where I feel like I can no longer breathe. Where I feel as if everywhere I go, the people that surround me don’t stop to think about the world in the same way I do or even at all.
These are the thoughts it feels like no one talks about when it comes to not only college, but moving to a brand new place. No one talks about how it feels to be alone or how hard it is to go out of your way to meet people. Why would we, I mean that requires us to allow people to see us struggling. It makes us feel weak.
But, all of these things take time. Although it feels, there is no way out, and you have already tried everything you possibly can, sometimes the answer is just time. Whether it has been a few weeks or months or even years, finding your people just takes time. But just know you are not alone and if anything, those feelings are what is more common. Instead, people just don’t talk about it.
Luv, Liv